Today I tried to see my son. I went in ready to do whatever they wanted, no matter how humiliating, or illegal. Though it isn’t court ordered they insisted on a drug test. They did say I needed to do their intake. I didn’t want to – that worker said in court documents that my sisters sexually abused me, something that I never said, and that’s completely ridiculous. She made it very clear with that – there is no low they wont sink to and if I go to my family for help I will endanger everyone, especially the children.
Still I was elated at the thought of seeing my baby because i knew the test would be negative.
I should have known better. I was not allowed to do a saliva or blood test, they insisted on urine even though my objections to them are well documented. Then the worker Troy Sherman told me to sit in the lobby while he went alone into the bathroom to administer the test. A room, of course, with no one else and no cameras. He didnt open the door again until he had a positive drug test.
I swear to God and all of you I was clean. I swear it on my son, on Boogie, on the tiny bit of love they’ve left me that I was clean. I did not do drugs. I did not drive 150 miles just to be devastated, thats insane.
He left me in the lobby claiming he needed to talk to his supervisor about sending me to rehab. He doesnt realize I have the acute autistic hearing. When I heard his elation at “getting me” I left. Intake, remember, is done by a woman willing to tell the most depraved lies in court – my family will never know or appreciate all ive done and suffered, so they’d be protected. After awhile Troy texted me, forgetting I had cc’d all the workers into the text, to make it easier to save as evidence. So it wasnt me that answered but instead the intake worker, a woman named Denise Ochoa, assumed it was to her and responded before I could.
Troy Sherman texted: “Why did you leave I had you set up for AODS intake at 10 but you left”
Which was promptly replied to by Denise (not the sharpest tool in the shed – I concede her perjury may have been ineptitude not malice, but I still wasnt risking it.) with, “I am at a CFTM in ukiah”
Going to be a little difficult doing the intake from another city? And weird how it was set up without her knowledge even. Troy told her that it had been to me and she reaponded “Cool.”. I fell apart at this point and wasnt thinking real clearly but I answered finally.
I’ll admit what I said next I should have kept to myself. I said “Im going to buy rope. Bye, Troy.” Of course that got no response, not even the suicide hotline # – they could care less if i live or die.
But I already knew that, as much as seeing further proof hurt me. That im barely hanging on, devastated, suicidal… is no secret either I guess and is the truth even if I shouldnt admit it and know it will just be used to hurt me. Its the truth as is the fact child protective services is beyond corrupt. Every bad thing you ever read about them collecting bonuses for taking kids, lying in court, breaking the consititution left and right – all true. The truth is probably worse. I challenge you to do the research yourself.
A social worker named Mark Valles stole my son. I had endless proof his allegations (he contradicts himself in the court documents themselves) were untrue but the judge never saw any of it. How could he when my court appointed lawyer was so corrupt she advised me to lie and plead no contest – while hiding court dates from me so I wouldnt show up.
I am going to the courthouse to petition them for all the documents, so you all can see for yourself. I have nothing to hide or take, I have nothing left. If something does happen to me – someone please dig for the truth. And tell my son I never gave up on him and never would. I love him more than anything and would do anything just to see him safe.
And thank you to the few who have kept faith in me no matter what – youre the reason im still drawing breath. I am taking avow of silence when it comes to the noise i make that is just ignored. As for the truth, im just getting started…